Build your dating confidence & self-esteem
There is nothing sexier than a person with confidence who carries themselves well. So, what can you do to build your confidence and self-esteem so that you attract the right dream partner?
There's good and bad news here. First the good news - you can be confident, sexy and a head turner. Now the bad news - it will take effort and work on your part.
In our world of sound bytes, instant gratification and immediate responses, everyone looks for the quick fix! The makeover must change us instantly. The therapist or coach must make us feel good, in the first session - and it's incomprehensible that we'd have to stomach one minute more of the pain or discomfort we are feeling.
The truth, however, is that it takes time, effort, energy and probably money to feel better about yourself and what you present to the world. The art of building up your confidence and self esteem is two-pronged: what you do to improve yourself from the inside and what you do to improve yourself on the outside.
Keeping up appearances
Few of us €normal' people have been blessed with the genetic attributes that would label us gorgeous or beautiful. However, that doesn't mean that we cannot make the best of what we have!
So many men and women tend to let themselves go, especially when in a relationship, thinking that it doesn't matter anymore - their partner loves them, so they stop trying to be attractive or sexy.
First impressions last
One of the first questions anyone asks about a new partner you mention is, "where did you meet", largely because the first meeting, and the first impression you made, is that crucial to all of us!
You have to think of your body as your brand packaging.
If you started a business, you'd have the logo, brand identity and packaging sorted first so that you could present a professional image to the world. Well, when it comes to relationships, your appearance is your brand identity.
Just as you want to be physically attracted to the partner with whom you engage, they want to find you similarly attractive, so as much as we don't like to admit it, looks do count when choosing a partner.
Likewise, your ability to be comfortable in a relationship - and with sex - is based on how you feel about your body and how relaxed you are being naked around someone else.
A key point to remember is that different people are attracted to different things and being sexy doesn't mean that you have to be a supermodel or even supermodel skinny. There are plenty of people out there to whom body shape doesn't matter at all - and those who love the larger, more abundant, curvaceous body types.
So here are a few simple tips to consider when improving your appearance - and your chances of attracting that perfect partner when they come along:
If you feel you need to lose excess weight, go on a diet or start an exercise programme
If you are satisfied with your weight in general, but feel you need to firm up certain parts of your body, then join a gym or start an exercise programme
Consider changing the style and/or colour of your hair, and ladies, men almost ALWAYS prefer a longer, more feminine hair style
If you wear glasses, you may want to consider contact lenses
Revamp your wardrobe and throw out anything that doesn't flatter you, or makes you look dowdy or doesn't show off your body in an appealing way
Invest in some sexy items of new clothing, and make sure your wardrobe has at least one superb little black dress and a provocative pair of heels to match
Embrace your curves!! Put on something sexy that you'd usually avoid, or see a stylist and find a whole new way of dressing that flatters instead of hides your body.
Throw out your old makeup and your old style, experiment with different ways of doing your eye shadow, experiment with colours in lipstick and nail varnish
Book a full body scrub and a facial or invest in a pair of Body Shop exfoliating gloves that you use all over your body! There's something insanely sexy about soft, smooth, well-moisturized and touchable skin
Book a manicure and pedicure and make a commitment to regularly looking after your hands and feet - hands and feet are areas that can put people off pretty quickly, so they're worth looking after.
It's easy to be caught in a rut and feel as though you're stuck there - the best way out is to make the changes you want to see. You'll be pleasantly surprised to discover how easy it is to change your appearance once you start and the ensuing rise in your self confidence is a perk!
A beautiful personality€¦ beautiful from the inside out
Even the prettiest, sexiest woman in the world will be dumped unceremoniously if she is a cold-hearted bitch, and the truth is that who and what you are on the inside is more important than what you are on the outside. The reason being, that as we get older and our looks fade - no one is immune to that - personality and character remain until the day we die - and that's what we're actually committing ourselves to in a relationship.
So what characteristics do you have that make you attractive, what do you need to develop and what do you need to temper or change in order to become a better person?
Are you excessively possessive and jealous?
Are you too aloof or too attached and clingy?
Are you compassionate, attentive and caring?
Do you believe in equal give and take?
Are you relaxing to be around and spend time with?
Are you easy to live with and considerate of other people's needs?
Do you only think of yourself or do you consider the needs of others?
Clearly the list of potential characteristics to develop or get rid of is as long as there are people in the world because we're all at different stages of our evolution and development.
A great way to identify the characteristics that apply to you, is to:
Make a list of the 20 most influential or important people in your life and list their good and bad characteristics; you can only see in others what you contain within yourself, so the things you list are actually about you
Look for the things you admire or deride in others; as we admire or detest the traits we're missing in ourselves. This exercise helps to identify what is missing in your character and identifying that need, or the lack of it, can stop you from continually attracting that sort of energy into your life
The best route when working with improving yourself from the inside out is to consider a coach or therapist or, if you're that way inclined, some sort of spiritual healing modality.
The positive change you can achieve long term with any of these processes is quite staggering, and if you commit to improving yourself you will see a marked enrichment in all areas of your life, and not only in your romantic relationships.
€
There is nothing sexier than a person with confidence who carries themselves well. So, what can you do to build your confidence and self-esteem so that you attract the right dream partner?
There's good and bad news here. First the good news - you can be confident, sexy and a head turner. Now the bad news - it will take effort and work on your part.
In our world of sound bytes, instant gratification and immediate responses, everyone looks for the quick fix! The makeover must change us instantly. The therapist or coach must make us feel good, in the first session - and it's incomprehensible that we'd have to stomach one minute more of the pain or discomfort we are feeling.
The truth, however, is that it takes time, effort, energy and probably money to feel better about yourself and what you present to the world. The art of building up your confidence and self esteem is two-pronged: what you do to improve yourself from the inside and what you do to improve yourself on the outside.
Keeping up appearances
Few of us €normal' people have been blessed with the genetic attributes that would label us gorgeous or beautiful. However, that doesn't mean that we cannot make the best of what we have!
So many men and women tend to let themselves go, especially when in a relationship, thinking that it doesn't matter anymore - their partner loves them, so they stop trying to be attractive or sexy.
First impressions last
One of the first questions anyone asks about a new partner you mention is, "where did you meet", largely because the first meeting, and the first impression you made, is that crucial to all of us!
You have to think of your body as your brand packaging.
If you started a business, you'd have the logo, brand identity and packaging sorted first so that you could present a professional image to the world. Well, when it comes to relationships, your appearance is your brand identity.
Just as you want to be physically attracted to the partner with whom you engage, they want to find you similarly attractive, so as much as we don't like to admit it, looks do count when choosing a partner.
Likewise, your ability to be comfortable in a relationship - and with sex - is based on how you feel about your body and how relaxed you are being naked around someone else.
A key point to remember is that different people are attracted to different things and being sexy doesn't mean that you have to be a supermodel or even supermodel skinny. There are plenty of people out there to whom body shape doesn't matter at all - and those who love the larger, more abundant, curvaceous body types.
So here are a few simple tips to consider when improving your appearance - and your chances of attracting that perfect partner when they come along:
If you feel you need to lose excess weight, go on a diet or start an exercise programme
If you are satisfied with your weight in general, but feel you need to firm up certain parts of your body, then join a gym or start an exercise programme
Consider changing the style and/or colour of your hair, and ladies, men almost ALWAYS prefer a longer, more feminine hair style
If you wear glasses, you may want to consider contact lenses
Revamp your wardrobe and throw out anything that doesn't flatter you, or makes you look dowdy or doesn't show off your body in an appealing way
Invest in some sexy items of new clothing, and make sure your wardrobe has at least one superb little black dress and a provocative pair of heels to match
Embrace your curves!! Put on something sexy that you'd usually avoid, or see a stylist and find a whole new way of dressing that flatters instead of hides your body.
Throw out your old makeup and your old style, experiment with different ways of doing your eye shadow, experiment with colours in lipstick and nail varnish
Book a full body scrub and a facial or invest in a pair of Body Shop exfoliating gloves that you use all over your body! There's something insanely sexy about soft, smooth, well-moisturized and touchable skin
Book a manicure and pedicure and make a commitment to regularly looking after your hands and feet - hands and feet are areas that can put people off pretty quickly, so they're worth looking after.
It's easy to be caught in a rut and feel as though you're stuck there - the best way out is to make the changes you want to see. You'll be pleasantly surprised to discover how easy it is to change your appearance once you start and the ensuing rise in your self confidence is a perk!
A beautiful personality€¦ beautiful from the inside out
Even the prettiest, sexiest woman in the world will be dumped unceremoniously if she is a cold-hearted bitch, and the truth is that who and what you are on the inside is more important than what you are on the outside. The reason being, that as we get older and our looks fade - no one is immune to that - personality and character remain until the day we die - and that's what we're actually committing ourselves to in a relationship.
So what characteristics do you have that make you attractive, what do you need to develop and what do you need to temper or change in order to become a better person?
Are you excessively possessive and jealous?
Are you too aloof or too attached and clingy?
Are you compassionate, attentive and caring?
Do you believe in equal give and take?
Are you relaxing to be around and spend time with?
Are you easy to live with and considerate of other people's needs?
Do you only think of yourself or do you consider the needs of others?
Clearly the list of potential characteristics to develop or get rid of is as long as there are people in the world because we're all at different stages of our evolution and development.
A great way to identify the characteristics that apply to you, is to:
Make a list of the 20 most influential or important people in your life and list their good and bad characteristics; you can only see in others what you contain within yourself, so the things you list are actually about you
Look for the things you admire or deride in others; as we admire or detest the traits we're missing in ourselves. This exercise helps to identify what is missing in your character and identifying that need, or the lack of it, can stop you from continually attracting that sort of energy into your life
The best route when working with improving yourself from the inside out is to consider a coach or therapist or, if you're that way inclined, some sort of spiritual healing modality.
The positive change you can achieve long term with any of these processes is quite staggering, and if you commit to improving yourself you will see a marked enrichment in all areas of your life, and not only in your romantic relationships.
€