It is unusual for me not to be in school on a weekday like this.
Classes have just started, and for the past three years, it has been my life to be in school during this time and welcome students to the new academic year.
And like my students excited to be wearing their new stuff in school, I know I would've been 'excited' to wear a new set of uniform.
But for today, instead of my uniform, I'm just in my 'pambahay' clothes.
And instead of holding my instructional materials and everything I can use to keep the students busy for the three-hour HR time, I only have one beautiful thing on my hands-my baby.
Then, I say to myself, "Welcome to a new school year!" Yes, it's a new school year for me, and I'm taking up a life-long course-motherhood.
This time, I'm the student.
I'll be the one taking down notes, 'watching presentations' and taking 'tests' (most of them practical) that my teacher would give me.
And what a great way to start a new school year by having a new teacher (and definitely my favorite) - my baby.
Looking around, I noticed that I have a bigger classroom now - my world and my child's.
There are no more bulletin boards to decorate, but my 'classroom' still lights up with his mere presence.
In this classroom, I no longer hear the cheers, laughter, and voices of a batch of girls.
Instead, I hear the laughter, cry and voice of a little boy when we're in a 'discussion' (most of the time I hear him say, "ababababa").
And in this classroom, I have my own core value- unconditional love.
Just like an ordinary student, I am excited to learn new things.
It just gives me a thrill to learn something new, like when I bathe him the first time.
If in school, multi-task to me means to rest and to check test papers at the same time, in my new classroom it means to put him to sleep, to feed him and to edit a manuscript, all at the same time.
At the same time, I am also afraid to fail tests that this course would give me.
So far, I have taken diagnostic tests on patience and strength.
And I'm glad to have passed the how-long-can-you-stay-awake-at-night test.
Do I miss teaching? With all my heart, I do.
But for now, I'd like to be the one on the arm chair.
I'd like to take all the lessons my child can give me to make me whole again.
I'd like to take the tests he will give to bring back the confidence in myself that I lost.
I as the student and my child as my teacher.
When the time comes that he has to evaluate my performance, I do hope he'll give me a fair judgment and more importantly, I hope that he will be honest with me about it.
Classes have just started, and for the past three years, it has been my life to be in school during this time and welcome students to the new academic year.
And like my students excited to be wearing their new stuff in school, I know I would've been 'excited' to wear a new set of uniform.
But for today, instead of my uniform, I'm just in my 'pambahay' clothes.
And instead of holding my instructional materials and everything I can use to keep the students busy for the three-hour HR time, I only have one beautiful thing on my hands-my baby.
Then, I say to myself, "Welcome to a new school year!" Yes, it's a new school year for me, and I'm taking up a life-long course-motherhood.
This time, I'm the student.
I'll be the one taking down notes, 'watching presentations' and taking 'tests' (most of them practical) that my teacher would give me.
And what a great way to start a new school year by having a new teacher (and definitely my favorite) - my baby.
Looking around, I noticed that I have a bigger classroom now - my world and my child's.
There are no more bulletin boards to decorate, but my 'classroom' still lights up with his mere presence.
In this classroom, I no longer hear the cheers, laughter, and voices of a batch of girls.
Instead, I hear the laughter, cry and voice of a little boy when we're in a 'discussion' (most of the time I hear him say, "ababababa").
And in this classroom, I have my own core value- unconditional love.
Just like an ordinary student, I am excited to learn new things.
It just gives me a thrill to learn something new, like when I bathe him the first time.
If in school, multi-task to me means to rest and to check test papers at the same time, in my new classroom it means to put him to sleep, to feed him and to edit a manuscript, all at the same time.
At the same time, I am also afraid to fail tests that this course would give me.
So far, I have taken diagnostic tests on patience and strength.
And I'm glad to have passed the how-long-can-you-stay-awake-at-night test.
Do I miss teaching? With all my heart, I do.
But for now, I'd like to be the one on the arm chair.
I'd like to take all the lessons my child can give me to make me whole again.
I'd like to take the tests he will give to bring back the confidence in myself that I lost.
I as the student and my child as my teacher.
When the time comes that he has to evaluate my performance, I do hope he'll give me a fair judgment and more importantly, I hope that he will be honest with me about it.