Raising children is a challenging and often frustrating task, ask any parent.
Some children are easier than others, but there are no perfect children or perfect parents; and even the most successful parents can see their family-harmony crumble away when their sweet little boys or girls become hard to deal with, unruly, teenagers.
Teenagers are notorious for being difficult, obstinate, argumentative and self-centered - they are on the verge of adulthood and struggling to find their identity and independence, while learning to cope with an excess of new hormones flooding their bodies.
Yes, we may know all this and think we've prepared ourselves for the worst - but it is a great shock to see a happy child turn into an almost complete stranger right before your eyes.
I've seen this happen in the families of the peers of my own teenage son, and I see it to an even more drastic degree among the children I work with - children who already have learning and behavioral problems.
No amount of "good-parenting" experience can guarantee that your child will go through adolescence without troubling problems, but when those problems are not resolved, it can have a disastrous effect on the family unit, and life-long negative consequences for both children and parents.
In today's society, where physical discipline is no longer accepted as a desirable, or effective means to maintain the authority of the parent over the children, it is up to the parents to discover and use more creative ways to deal with unruly teenagers, and keep the balance of harmony, respect and love within the family.
The problem is that we have learned most of our parenting tactics from our own parents - and we use them, adapt them or dismiss them according to our own childhood experience.
But when these tactics stop working, we have to turn to others for help - most often the specialized expertise at our disposal in the form of "books from the experts", or, when things get really bad, we can call personally on those experts (at a cost and a great deal of heartache) and put our children under the care of therapists.
But we don't have to let it get that bad.
The danger to parents of being seen as a "bad parent" when their teenagers become unruly, puts them under enormous stress and pressure, which adds to the emotional imbalance in the child-parent relationship.
This pressure on parents may dissuade them from seeking help and guidance when they need it - leaving them to continually use tactics that don't work, create more and more conflict situations, and lose complete control over their relationship with their child.
But it is of the highest importance to seek help - and not to feel ashamed when you do so.
The internet has opened us up to even greater sources of information, help, guidance and support than was ever possible before.
Thousands of ebooks, websites, forums, online programs and down-loadable parenting methods are at the disposal of every parent, covering every aspect of parenting, and specifying every child age-group and their particular requirements.
Much of this information is free, and it encompasses more insight and experience than any one parent can ever gain alone.
If you are trying hard, and failing, to deal with unruly teenagers, the internet can lead you to the light at the end of the tunnel.
There are programs available that offer full parent support and guidance - from people who have many years experience in dealing with every child and teenage problem imaginable - and the chance to talk with hundreds of other parents dealing with the same situations as you may be dealing with.
I believe that the last great task of parents, is to guide their teenagers into adulthood with a positive image of themselves and the world as a whole.
It is therefore vital that any parent-child conflicts are resolved before the child leaves the nest.
It is the duty of the parents to make this happen, to accept that they may need help to make it happen, and to seek that help wherever they can before it's too late.
Some children are easier than others, but there are no perfect children or perfect parents; and even the most successful parents can see their family-harmony crumble away when their sweet little boys or girls become hard to deal with, unruly, teenagers.
Teenagers are notorious for being difficult, obstinate, argumentative and self-centered - they are on the verge of adulthood and struggling to find their identity and independence, while learning to cope with an excess of new hormones flooding their bodies.
Yes, we may know all this and think we've prepared ourselves for the worst - but it is a great shock to see a happy child turn into an almost complete stranger right before your eyes.
I've seen this happen in the families of the peers of my own teenage son, and I see it to an even more drastic degree among the children I work with - children who already have learning and behavioral problems.
No amount of "good-parenting" experience can guarantee that your child will go through adolescence without troubling problems, but when those problems are not resolved, it can have a disastrous effect on the family unit, and life-long negative consequences for both children and parents.
In today's society, where physical discipline is no longer accepted as a desirable, or effective means to maintain the authority of the parent over the children, it is up to the parents to discover and use more creative ways to deal with unruly teenagers, and keep the balance of harmony, respect and love within the family.
The problem is that we have learned most of our parenting tactics from our own parents - and we use them, adapt them or dismiss them according to our own childhood experience.
But when these tactics stop working, we have to turn to others for help - most often the specialized expertise at our disposal in the form of "books from the experts", or, when things get really bad, we can call personally on those experts (at a cost and a great deal of heartache) and put our children under the care of therapists.
But we don't have to let it get that bad.
The danger to parents of being seen as a "bad parent" when their teenagers become unruly, puts them under enormous stress and pressure, which adds to the emotional imbalance in the child-parent relationship.
This pressure on parents may dissuade them from seeking help and guidance when they need it - leaving them to continually use tactics that don't work, create more and more conflict situations, and lose complete control over their relationship with their child.
But it is of the highest importance to seek help - and not to feel ashamed when you do so.
The internet has opened us up to even greater sources of information, help, guidance and support than was ever possible before.
Thousands of ebooks, websites, forums, online programs and down-loadable parenting methods are at the disposal of every parent, covering every aspect of parenting, and specifying every child age-group and their particular requirements.
Much of this information is free, and it encompasses more insight and experience than any one parent can ever gain alone.
If you are trying hard, and failing, to deal with unruly teenagers, the internet can lead you to the light at the end of the tunnel.
There are programs available that offer full parent support and guidance - from people who have many years experience in dealing with every child and teenage problem imaginable - and the chance to talk with hundreds of other parents dealing with the same situations as you may be dealing with.
I believe that the last great task of parents, is to guide their teenagers into adulthood with a positive image of themselves and the world as a whole.
It is therefore vital that any parent-child conflicts are resolved before the child leaves the nest.
It is the duty of the parents to make this happen, to accept that they may need help to make it happen, and to seek that help wherever they can before it's too late.