Dating Advice - Does a Man Appreciate You For Who You Really Are?
"A man can be happy with any woman as long as he does not love her," said Oscar Wilde.
When we don't love someone, it's easy to ignore their flaws and idiosyncrasies and focus on why we "need" them.
As long your pedicurist keeps giving you great pedicures, what do you care about her drinking habits and lousy housekeeping? Similarly, we can get hooked up with men who use us to fulfill their needs without loving us.
While all women know this, we're often blinded by the light of romance and end up becoming victims of users.
If you want to avoid this phenomenon, you have to know what to look for, and the following three scenarios are a good start.
Gold Digging Traditionally, it's the woman who does the gold digging.
But men can be gold diggers too.
At first, a gold digger seems like the nicest guy ever.
He arrives on time, buys you gifts, listens intently to your problems, etc.
But rest assured, his immaculate niceness has a price tag: your bank account.
As soon as he's won your trust, he'll start executing his designs, such as asking you to pay his bills or buy him gifts, or offering to invest your money.
And if you question his motives, he'll respond by questioning your love.
Ultimately, a man who is interested in "you" wouldn't risk your opinion of him for money.
And remember, you don't have to be rich to be the victim of a gold digger.
If he can obtain a cool grand and then drop you; hey, that's better than nothing.
Sex Pure and Simple While we all know that men crave sex, the fact is, so do we.
However, most of us would like some love to go along with the all night rocking.
Sex is the natural result of physical attraction, but there is nothing more depressing than being involved in a one-night stand when you expected something more.
If a man's language and body language give the impression that he's on the make, he probably is.
One-night stand artists exhibit the following characteristics: egotistical self-appraisal, shallow charm, physical closeness and, as the evening grows late, persuasion to go somewhere private.
Ultimately, a man who values your personality will never press the sex angle.
Instead of putting a meaningless notch in your bedpost, why not wait for a true gentleman? Trophy Seeking We've all heard of trophy wives, but there are also trophy girlfriends.
Unlike the one-night stand artist, the trophy seeker is a bit cerebral; he leverages an attractive woman to win praise from his peers.
While being a trophy might not sound all that bad, it means that you're only cherished for your appearance.
If your date starts behaving like a fashion assistant, surveying your entire appearance for the slightest flaw, there's a good chance that he's telling you that your beauty is skin deep.
When we don't love someone, it's easy to ignore their flaws and idiosyncrasies and focus on why we "need" them.
As long your pedicurist keeps giving you great pedicures, what do you care about her drinking habits and lousy housekeeping? Similarly, we can get hooked up with men who use us to fulfill their needs without loving us.
While all women know this, we're often blinded by the light of romance and end up becoming victims of users.
If you want to avoid this phenomenon, you have to know what to look for, and the following three scenarios are a good start.
Gold Digging Traditionally, it's the woman who does the gold digging.
But men can be gold diggers too.
At first, a gold digger seems like the nicest guy ever.
He arrives on time, buys you gifts, listens intently to your problems, etc.
But rest assured, his immaculate niceness has a price tag: your bank account.
As soon as he's won your trust, he'll start executing his designs, such as asking you to pay his bills or buy him gifts, or offering to invest your money.
And if you question his motives, he'll respond by questioning your love.
Ultimately, a man who is interested in "you" wouldn't risk your opinion of him for money.
And remember, you don't have to be rich to be the victim of a gold digger.
If he can obtain a cool grand and then drop you; hey, that's better than nothing.
Sex Pure and Simple While we all know that men crave sex, the fact is, so do we.
However, most of us would like some love to go along with the all night rocking.
Sex is the natural result of physical attraction, but there is nothing more depressing than being involved in a one-night stand when you expected something more.
If a man's language and body language give the impression that he's on the make, he probably is.
One-night stand artists exhibit the following characteristics: egotistical self-appraisal, shallow charm, physical closeness and, as the evening grows late, persuasion to go somewhere private.
Ultimately, a man who values your personality will never press the sex angle.
Instead of putting a meaningless notch in your bedpost, why not wait for a true gentleman? Trophy Seeking We've all heard of trophy wives, but there are also trophy girlfriends.
Unlike the one-night stand artist, the trophy seeker is a bit cerebral; he leverages an attractive woman to win praise from his peers.
While being a trophy might not sound all that bad, it means that you're only cherished for your appearance.
If your date starts behaving like a fashion assistant, surveying your entire appearance for the slightest flaw, there's a good chance that he's telling you that your beauty is skin deep.