Many people take their kids and run when subjected to bullying and ostracism. I guess that this is what it is all about. Whether one is young or old the rejection from ones peers, school or community is horrible. Throughout time hundreds and even thousands of years ago it was used as a form of punishment when someone did not bend to the will of the pack.
No Tall Poppies Allowed! Head down bum up!
It is all designed by the leader of the pack and many conform out of fear or weakness.
There will be those, however, that are outside of the square, individualistic and non conformists by nature. How do you tell your child to try to fit into a peg hole if they are square? Do we encourage them to chop little bits off of themselves to please the pack?
Teach them that no one can own their sole. They need to hang on to who they are.
But a wise woman told me that realistically we all need to get on with our peers and later in life our co-workers, so it is important to teach our children how to shut up, crinkle their eyes, hang out their teeth and walk away. There is nothing like a good fake smile and walking away. While they are smiling they can think whatever they want.
The bullies are looking for a reaction so if we can teach our children not to react they will lose interest, if your child is lucky. If not you will have to intervene. Prepare yourself to feel rejected, alone, frustrated and like everything is against you. Know that when you take school or teacher to task they will most probably let you down if the family attached to the monstrous child is more powerful in your community.
Know that bullies breed bullies, as the parent is the one that sets the tone and is the child's role model. Know that people are not on their side they simply fear the ramifications of standing up to the bully.
You can contact the following authorities if your child is being bullied and the school, public or private, is not handling it:
Police Youth Education
Ministry of Education
Office of Children's Commissioner
Human Rights Commissioner
Education Review Office- http://www.ero.govt.nz
Legal Aid for Kids
Teachers Council - http://www.teacherscouncil.govt.nz or the equivalent in your state and country.
If you have an issue with a teacher that fails to help your child, takes the easy way out and the administration fails to remedy the situation you have rights. Check the legislation where you live on Education Acts. In New Zealand Act 139AZC. *see resource area to view this document.
Your child needs to be in school and the school has to provide your child with a safe emotional and physical environment. If you keep your child home while waiting for the school to intervene recap every conversation with a follow up email on the day. You do not want to be charged with truancy. The responsibility to resolve the issue quickly is on the school. Put in writing what you are waiting for and that you wish for your child to be in school. There are a limited amount of days in a year that your child can be absent from school and a certain amount of consecutive days depending on legislation. Do your homework by asking all of the right questions. Do not be intimidated it is your job to advocate for your child.
If you have a conversation with a teacher and or principal recap it and make sure to leave a paper trail. If the bully belongs to a more powerful/popular family it happens that the school and other parents may turn on you so you will need the emails to prove the time line, incidents and assurances that you have been given to support your child.
There is definitely a Code of Ethics for Registered Teachers. Teachers need a teaching license for private and public school. Even if the school is not holding them accountable the Teachers Council will.
I Can Do It! is the only practical, flexible and diverse program that infuses self esteem in your children while teaching responsibility and self-sufficiency on a daily basis. To receive a FREE copy of The 9 Tough Parenting Problems & How To Solve Them report go to http://icandoitlifeskills.com
No Tall Poppies Allowed! Head down bum up!
It is all designed by the leader of the pack and many conform out of fear or weakness.
There will be those, however, that are outside of the square, individualistic and non conformists by nature. How do you tell your child to try to fit into a peg hole if they are square? Do we encourage them to chop little bits off of themselves to please the pack?
Teach them that no one can own their sole. They need to hang on to who they are.
But a wise woman told me that realistically we all need to get on with our peers and later in life our co-workers, so it is important to teach our children how to shut up, crinkle their eyes, hang out their teeth and walk away. There is nothing like a good fake smile and walking away. While they are smiling they can think whatever they want.
The bullies are looking for a reaction so if we can teach our children not to react they will lose interest, if your child is lucky. If not you will have to intervene. Prepare yourself to feel rejected, alone, frustrated and like everything is against you. Know that when you take school or teacher to task they will most probably let you down if the family attached to the monstrous child is more powerful in your community.
Know that bullies breed bullies, as the parent is the one that sets the tone and is the child's role model. Know that people are not on their side they simply fear the ramifications of standing up to the bully.
You can contact the following authorities if your child is being bullied and the school, public or private, is not handling it:
Police Youth Education
Ministry of Education
Office of Children's Commissioner
Human Rights Commissioner
Education Review Office- http://www.ero.govt.nz
Legal Aid for Kids
Teachers Council - http://www.teacherscouncil.govt.nz or the equivalent in your state and country.
If you have an issue with a teacher that fails to help your child, takes the easy way out and the administration fails to remedy the situation you have rights. Check the legislation where you live on Education Acts. In New Zealand Act 139AZC. *see resource area to view this document.
Your child needs to be in school and the school has to provide your child with a safe emotional and physical environment. If you keep your child home while waiting for the school to intervene recap every conversation with a follow up email on the day. You do not want to be charged with truancy. The responsibility to resolve the issue quickly is on the school. Put in writing what you are waiting for and that you wish for your child to be in school. There are a limited amount of days in a year that your child can be absent from school and a certain amount of consecutive days depending on legislation. Do your homework by asking all of the right questions. Do not be intimidated it is your job to advocate for your child.
If you have a conversation with a teacher and or principal recap it and make sure to leave a paper trail. If the bully belongs to a more powerful/popular family it happens that the school and other parents may turn on you so you will need the emails to prove the time line, incidents and assurances that you have been given to support your child.
There is definitely a Code of Ethics for Registered Teachers. Teachers need a teaching license for private and public school. Even if the school is not holding them accountable the Teachers Council will.
I Can Do It! is the only practical, flexible and diverse program that infuses self esteem in your children while teaching responsibility and self-sufficiency on a daily basis. To receive a FREE copy of The 9 Tough Parenting Problems & How To Solve Them report go to http://icandoitlifeskills.com