If you are serious about having your ex in your life again, you need to use a proven method that works.
After a breakup, most people want some time to process what went wrong in a relationship, especially if it is a relationship that they believed was going to last.
Time and space are extremely important right after a breakup, no one wants to be bombarded by phone calls and messages.
Once your ex has gotten over the shock of the breakup, and they have processed the why and the how of what happened, you can now start preparing to communicate with your ex again, when both of you are ready.
A lot of people who lose a relationship that meant something to them will almost always want to win their ex back.
However, in the case where the relationship was so strained, that the two of you cannot get back together, a lot of people are quite happy to be friends with their exes.
These people are from the thought that it is better to be friends with their ex than to lose them completely.
If you want friendship with your ex after trying to win them back and failing, you need to go slowly.
Do not push your ex into giving your relationship a chance when they are still hurting or are not ready to go there yet.
You need to be sensitive about whatever concerns they might have about trying to make the relationship work again.
Take an opportunity to show your ex how considerate and caring you are when it comes to their feelings.
Be the wonderful person that they forgot you can be and show them that you genuinely want to be with them.
If you can become that person that they were once attracted to, then you will have a better chance at winning their heart again.
Treat this as a new relationship, and do not bring up old arguments.
Look at this new chance as a chance for a new beginning, and bring the spark back into the relationship by being fun and adventurous.
Do not fall into the trap of wanting the same relationship you had with your spouse before, go for a new one, a better one.