On the receiving end of an unwanted breakup? Right now you're probably willing to do anything to get your ex back. And you know what? That's exactly why you'll fail.
Confidence, independence, happiness, security... these were things that attracted your ex boyfriend or girlfriend to you in the first place. Guys and girls are the same in this respect: they're both drawn to the stronger and more charismatic traits when it comes to choosing someone to go out with.
But right now, after the break up? You're insecure, upset, dependent and needy. Chances are good you've already made some of the bigger and more desperate mistakes when it comes to fixing your breakup: trying to contact your ex, making unwanted communication, or attempting to talk your boyfriend or girlfriend out of breaking up with you.
Luckily, there are 3 key actions you can take - right now - that will start you back on the path to reconciliation. By following these golden rules, you can quickly do the impossible: start making your ex want you again.
Break All Communication With Your Ex Boyfriend or Girlfriend
It's tough, but it's also necessary: you need to stop contacting or communicating with your ex. If you want this person back, the worst thing you can do right now is continue talking to them... because without even realizing it you're pushing yourself further and further away each time.
This step is all-inclusive, by the way. You can't write you ex letters, call them, email them, or send them even the most innocent of text-messages. No facebook, no myspace - no nothing at all. Your ex broke up with you? Good. Now break up with them, by totally distancing yourself.
Become a Complete Mystery To Your Ex
It's one thing every exboyfriend and exgirlfriend on the planet is guilty of: looking back to see how you're doing. As mean as it might sound, your ex wants to see you crying your eyes out right now. He or she wants to feel superior, as if they don't need you anymore. Why? Because it's comforting to see that you still need them.
This is why disappearing from your ex's view is so important right now. The sooner you can become a complete mystery to your exboyfriend or exgirlfriend, the faster you can erode away their confidence in the breakup. When your ex is wondering where you are (and even more importantly, who you're with) you're suddenly and unwillingly back on their mind again. This leads to a very important part of winning your ex back: getting them to miss you.
Improve Yourself and Your Situation
Want your ex to really want you back? You've got to become something he or she needs in their life again. When this person first fell in love with you it was for some very specific reasons. If you can give them these same reasons again, getting back together becomes a whole lot easier.
Improving yourself is a three-stage process. Mentally you need to clear your mind, and stop obsessing about the breakup. The moment you stop chasing your ex in your mind is a turning point in how this person will view you later on, while you're trying to repair things between you.
Emotionally, you also need to let go of the relationship. Understand that it's over, but also understand that you'll eventually forge a new one. Trying to fix your breakup might be impossible at this point, but creating a brand new relationship is always an option... and a fresh clean one at that.
Physically? It never hurts to make yourself look and feel better. Hitting the gym to work yourself back in shape is always a fantastic way of getting your ex to want you back. Exercise can help you work through any residual emotional issues, and while you're sweating off those unwanted pounds you're improving the way you look and feel.
Getting Your Ex To Contact You After The Break Up
If you can follow through with the actions described above, you've already positioned yourself for success. Your next move is to get your ex so curious that he or she needs to call you. There are great methods and techniques you can use to get your boyfriend or girlfriend to pick up the phone, and the sooner you learn these the faster you can start fixing your breakup.
Confidence, independence, happiness, security... these were things that attracted your ex boyfriend or girlfriend to you in the first place. Guys and girls are the same in this respect: they're both drawn to the stronger and more charismatic traits when it comes to choosing someone to go out with.
But right now, after the break up? You're insecure, upset, dependent and needy. Chances are good you've already made some of the bigger and more desperate mistakes when it comes to fixing your breakup: trying to contact your ex, making unwanted communication, or attempting to talk your boyfriend or girlfriend out of breaking up with you.
Luckily, there are 3 key actions you can take - right now - that will start you back on the path to reconciliation. By following these golden rules, you can quickly do the impossible: start making your ex want you again.
Break All Communication With Your Ex Boyfriend or Girlfriend
It's tough, but it's also necessary: you need to stop contacting or communicating with your ex. If you want this person back, the worst thing you can do right now is continue talking to them... because without even realizing it you're pushing yourself further and further away each time.
This step is all-inclusive, by the way. You can't write you ex letters, call them, email them, or send them even the most innocent of text-messages. No facebook, no myspace - no nothing at all. Your ex broke up with you? Good. Now break up with them, by totally distancing yourself.
Become a Complete Mystery To Your Ex
It's one thing every exboyfriend and exgirlfriend on the planet is guilty of: looking back to see how you're doing. As mean as it might sound, your ex wants to see you crying your eyes out right now. He or she wants to feel superior, as if they don't need you anymore. Why? Because it's comforting to see that you still need them.
This is why disappearing from your ex's view is so important right now. The sooner you can become a complete mystery to your exboyfriend or exgirlfriend, the faster you can erode away their confidence in the breakup. When your ex is wondering where you are (and even more importantly, who you're with) you're suddenly and unwillingly back on their mind again. This leads to a very important part of winning your ex back: getting them to miss you.
Improve Yourself and Your Situation
Want your ex to really want you back? You've got to become something he or she needs in their life again. When this person first fell in love with you it was for some very specific reasons. If you can give them these same reasons again, getting back together becomes a whole lot easier.
Improving yourself is a three-stage process. Mentally you need to clear your mind, and stop obsessing about the breakup. The moment you stop chasing your ex in your mind is a turning point in how this person will view you later on, while you're trying to repair things between you.
Emotionally, you also need to let go of the relationship. Understand that it's over, but also understand that you'll eventually forge a new one. Trying to fix your breakup might be impossible at this point, but creating a brand new relationship is always an option... and a fresh clean one at that.
Physically? It never hurts to make yourself look and feel better. Hitting the gym to work yourself back in shape is always a fantastic way of getting your ex to want you back. Exercise can help you work through any residual emotional issues, and while you're sweating off those unwanted pounds you're improving the way you look and feel.
Getting Your Ex To Contact You After The Break Up
If you can follow through with the actions described above, you've already positioned yourself for success. Your next move is to get your ex so curious that he or she needs to call you. There are great methods and techniques you can use to get your boyfriend or girlfriend to pick up the phone, and the sooner you learn these the faster you can start fixing your breakup.