Whether you call it separation or divorce, deciding to split up is a decision that should never be taken lightly.
There is always a time where space is needed between you and your partner, and space sometimes can be a very healthy decision.
It allows both parties to be able to rationally think about the best way to handle the task at hand, and to discuss a possible compromise.
There is never a clear sign of when the best time is to end the marriage, so taking "one last try at fixing the relationship" is something you may need to try a hundred times.
So consider this: If you are contemplating separation, decide how you and your partner can take time apart, without making any rash decisions, and taking that time to think of solutions.
Not sure how much time to take? Simple answer is as long as it takes.
There is no reason to rush into a separation or a divorce, so just play it out and see how it goes, it cannot get any worse when you already feel at the end of your rope.
When you have taken your time to think and come to some possible options for the two of you, plan a time to come together and discuss them.
Make it a special event; go out to dinner, or to a park.
Go anywhere where it is a relaxing atmosphere and you can stay calm and think clearly.
Have patience with your partner, listen closely and allow them to speak fully before you take your turn.
Make notes if you have to if you want to be able to respond to what they are saying without interrupting and worrying about forgetting what you had to say.
When both of you are finished, see what kind of solution is best for the two of you.
Now, if you were both able to reach some sort of solution together, great.
If not, consider talking to a counselor, because a third party helps to disarm any excess frustration, because they can mediate between the two of you.
If you have tried counseling before and it did not work the way you had hoped, or your partner has refused to go, try online counseling.
There are more and more couples taking courses online, because it is more comfortable then sitting with someone that is not part of your relationship.
By discussing things in an online environment, it allows you the same advice, without so much of an invasion of privacy.
Online counseling is also a more viable option for men, since they usually have a harder time with face to face counseling.
In the end, you need to know you had tried everything in order to save the relationship.
It is definitely worth it.
There is always a time where space is needed between you and your partner, and space sometimes can be a very healthy decision.
It allows both parties to be able to rationally think about the best way to handle the task at hand, and to discuss a possible compromise.
There is never a clear sign of when the best time is to end the marriage, so taking "one last try at fixing the relationship" is something you may need to try a hundred times.
So consider this: If you are contemplating separation, decide how you and your partner can take time apart, without making any rash decisions, and taking that time to think of solutions.
Not sure how much time to take? Simple answer is as long as it takes.
There is no reason to rush into a separation or a divorce, so just play it out and see how it goes, it cannot get any worse when you already feel at the end of your rope.
When you have taken your time to think and come to some possible options for the two of you, plan a time to come together and discuss them.
Make it a special event; go out to dinner, or to a park.
Go anywhere where it is a relaxing atmosphere and you can stay calm and think clearly.
Have patience with your partner, listen closely and allow them to speak fully before you take your turn.
Make notes if you have to if you want to be able to respond to what they are saying without interrupting and worrying about forgetting what you had to say.
When both of you are finished, see what kind of solution is best for the two of you.
Now, if you were both able to reach some sort of solution together, great.
If not, consider talking to a counselor, because a third party helps to disarm any excess frustration, because they can mediate between the two of you.
If you have tried counseling before and it did not work the way you had hoped, or your partner has refused to go, try online counseling.
There are more and more couples taking courses online, because it is more comfortable then sitting with someone that is not part of your relationship.
By discussing things in an online environment, it allows you the same advice, without so much of an invasion of privacy.
Online counseling is also a more viable option for men, since they usually have a harder time with face to face counseling.
In the end, you need to know you had tried everything in order to save the relationship.
It is definitely worth it.