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The authors of the bestselling book Fighting for Your Marriage, Howard Markman, Ph.D., and Susan Blumberg, Ph.D. have joined with Joel Crohn, Ph.D. a trained PREP psychologist who specializes in working with Jewish and interfaith couples and Janice Levine, Ph.D. who is a Jewish PREP trainer and therapist, to write Fighting for Your Jewish Marriage: Preserving a Lasting Promise.

Introduction

They state in their introduction that, "we believe that marriage is the most risky undertaking routinely taken on by the greatest number of people in our society ….

Good marriages take work. Contrary to popular belief, it is not how much you love each other that can best predict the future of your relationship but how you handle conflicts and disagreements. Unfortunately, conflict is inevitable --- it can't be avoided. So if you want to have a good marriage, you had better learn to fight right."

If you are a Jewish or interfaith couple looking for practical tools to help you improve your communication, and to learn how to resolve conflicts and enhance and preserve your marriage … then this is the book you should read. It is based on the PREP (Prevention and Relationship Enhancement) Program and blends the wisdom of Jewish traditions with scientific research to help couples create successful marriages.

These tools work. The divorce rates can be reduced by as much as 50% in couples who have learned and use the techniques taught here.

Chapters Include:

• Creating a Positive Jewish Identity that Supports Your Marriage
• Four Key Patterns that can Harm a Relationship

• Changing Roles, Changing Rules
• Communicating Clearly and Safely
• Problem Solving
• Ground Rules for Handling Conflict
• The Difference Between Issues and Events
• Unfulfilled Expectations and What to Do About Them
• Choosing Commitment
• The Importance of Core Belief Systems
• Atonement, Forgiveness, and the Restoration of Intimacy
• Preserving and Protecting Friendship
• Overcoming the Fear of Fun
• Thou Shalt Enjoy Sex
• Ancient Wisdom and Modern Insights

We found the chapters on forgiveness and having fun especially insightful. Some of the myths about forgiveness are explored and reasons for why couples quit having fun together are questioned.

In his introduction to this work, Rabbi Harold M. Schulweis describes this book as: "It is rooted in a deep conviction that it is never too late to build again, to hope again, to love again."

We think this is an excellent guide for interfaith and Jewish couples, but any couple who wants to enhance their marriage and deepen their commitment to one another will find the exercises and examples helpful.

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Disclosure: A review copy was provided by the publisher. For more information, please see our Ethics Policy.